FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 10:18:27 PST 1997
Hey Myk - I e-mailed you again. Gee. It sure does get quiet when Sleepy and Cushca go home. I thought Voltaic was going to abuse us for a while but even he didn't stay. What a crying shame. I did appreciate his Robyn related postings though. Very insightful.

FROM: the ood man
DATE: Fri Dec 5 10:18:19 PST 1997
Ghastly ghoulish hideous inhuman heads. Eyes everywhere, bulbous protrusions,Sometimes I wish I was a pretty girl.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 10:01:46 PST 1997
i didn't get any photos, so i doubt sleepy did either. no attachments were on any of the last 3 emails i got. you should resend (to her, not me... heh heh).

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:57:07 PST 1997
Bye Sleepy. Have a great weekend. And Myk - don't look at the photos. That e-mail was not for you.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:50:43 PST 1997
bye sleepy! ...and cushca, i a--ume.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:50:04 PST 1997
you silly folks. gotta check my mail again... god knows WHAT i got.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:49:35 PST 1997
I'm going home now. Have a good weekend everyone. Speak on Monday.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:47:57 PST 1997
Oh, goodness. I hope you didn't send the picture...

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:44:36 PST 1997
Sleepy - yes! I replied to the first one, but somehow sent it to Myk by accident. Then I sent it to you. Thank goodness I cut the paragraph describing... well anyhow.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:38:25 PST 1997
CW - did you get my plethora of e:mails?!

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:36:23 PST 1997

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:21:11 PST 1997
Congratulations WLA! You've received the Voltaic Quality Post Seal of Approval!

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:18:09 PST 1997
Anaybody ?

FROM: A Non-Eyed Moose
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:16:37 PST 1997
wb: to confess to doing anything on this board while spending half of the confession denying doing things was the single most brilliant comedy I've read here in at least two hours.

FROM: WLA Rah Rah Rah!
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:12:45 PST 1997
By the way, Thank You WLA for that Robyn news last night. That was a quality post, providing news about a future album, collaborations, and more.

FROM: Liz Smith
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:11:12 PST 1997
Chewing Wax: You have been peaking under your bed again (re: 3 18 year olds). RE: Prince...Anaybody who can look that cool, and play incredible LEAD guitar while singing is pretty great. That was an old show, though....wasn't it? They had Jocelyn Elders jokes... The other genius stroke of Prince's was figuring out a way not to have to talk to Dave at the end of his song by playing dead and having a goon drag him off stage. I'd bet a hundred bucks that p--sed Dave off.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 09:11:07 PST 1997
Mooch! greetings! we warily await the weasel's web wanderings! alliteration is fun. i responded, sleepy, though i accidently omitted cushca... feel free to forward it, or have her sit on your lap while you both read the monitor... oops, i've been scolded once about this sort of thing...

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:58:21 PST 1997
Hey mooch.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:58:12 PST 1997
Hi m!

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:56:57 PST 1997
mooch, I'll look for the Queen, and (in true Robyn spirit), I'll wish I was in her veins.

FROM: mooch <nose@grindstone>
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:55:02 PST 1997
Good day everyone..just sliding through,..yikes! whats happening here? rOb..the postal strike is over,look for pictures of the queen..Myk,CW,Sleepy,Cushca,Hooded,hello,get a hotel...any "Fall" fans?...have nice weekends .I dont get to the comp much these days it's $$$$time.but I'm not complaining..Chat a day& for the weasel to pop in when I can find something interesting and applicable to Robyn, or just plain nutty...later ..

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:42:22 PST 1997
Myk - check your e:mail.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:41:21 PST 1997
There were several Japanese girls buying up crateloads of Silver Sun t-shirts yesterday. I sent a messenger off to get one for me - not that I could ever wear it out, thanks to the charming, semi-obscene slogan on the back.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:36:58 PST 1997
rOb--Live at Red Rocks! Oh, yeah...there's also a SC compilation CD coming out...there's been talk (only talk right now) of my inclusion on said CD. "well, I'm moving on up, to a deluxe apartment in the sky..."

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:29:44 PST 1997
much success for rob! a recording, you say?! what a swell thing. sounds like a double CD is in the works. soon, it will be "rOb at Budokan". how can he think of claire when 15,000 japanese girls are screaming his name!? yeah baby yeah!

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:28:59 PST 1997
Well done rOb!

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:25:43 PST 1997
Just got word....I'm gigging again! Next weekend! Just in time to premiere three new songs!! Oh, yeah, they agreed to record the gig! Who's the man?!? I say I am!

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:16:31 PST 1997
sounds like a nice view, sleepy. i enjoy sunsets quite a bit, unless i'm driving into one.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:12:34 PST 1997
There's an incredible pink sunset tonight. All the windows in a building opposite me have turned fuchsia.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:10:54 PST 1997
sorry, folks, i used french, so i figured it was veiled enough. i suppose not, in retrospect. ok ok, back in the basket.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:05:16 PST 1997
I've tried. I've tried so hard with that one. He's just incorrigible. He'll break his mother's heart he will.

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:02:27 PST 1997
...or in a bucket of water......

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 08:01:15 PST 1997
Once more CW, I would ask you to pick Myk up by the scruff of the neck and put him back in his basket.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:59:47 PST 1997
You always have to go too far and ruin it for everyone don't you Myk?

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:54:53 PST 1997
uh oh, i think we're lookin' at another petite incident. giggle.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:52:48 PST 1997
Ah. That's so romatic. Young love is a wonderful thing.

FROM: Sleepy & Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:47:57 PST 1997
For us, it's always Crystal Gayle's tender ballad "Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue". Either that or, Motorhead's "Ace of Spades".

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:39:20 PST 1997
Cushca: adding DK at the end is a nice touch. which of those albums do you play over the office intercom when you and sleepy head to the stationery cupboard? just curious. giggle. Nice work, wax. heh heh.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:36:27 PST 1997
The theme song to ESPN SportsCenter is very good.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:34:20 PST 1997
don't worry, sleepy. i can't imagine Robyn's music as part of my mating ritual, except the wonderful beginning of Devil's Radio: "Darling... you don't have to call me Stalin... or even Mao Tse Tung, cuz I'm far too young." i just love that. one day i shall drunkenly say that to a lover. she will no doubt be baffled and disturbed by this. what a wonderful thing.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:33:59 PST 1997
Wait wait. I'm writing this down.

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:31:57 PST 1997
Grace - Jeff Buckley; Urban Hymns - The Verve; Blue Lines - Massive Attack; Sinking - The Aloof; Protection - Massive Attack; The Best of Elvis (for Suspicious Minds); the soundtrack to The Jungle Book and The Dead Kennedys - Too Drunk To f--k. OK????

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:30:12 PST 1997
I once made steamy love all night long to three beautiful eighteen year old girls visiting from Sweden with "I Often Dream of Trains" on repeat. What the hell were their names again?

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:30:06 PST 1997
Elvis C. in a hiphop outfit? god help him. i must state that prince is a genius, musically, but rarely am i in the mood to listen to him.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:28:23 PST 1997
I'm just kidding rOb.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:28:00 PST 1997
CW - ah, thanks. Don't anyone mention Robyn in this little love-in, or I'll never be able to listen to him again.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:26:50 PST 1997
No prob, Myk. I'm over her. I just like to talk about her, that's all.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:26:07 PST 1997
Sleepy - "You bastards" is a line from South Park, a charming childrens cartoon on Comedy Central every Wednesday night. And wb called me naive yesterday.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:25:15 PST 1997
good luck with the little one, decoy. i understand your automobile rationale. sorry if i prompted thoughts of claire, rob, it was unintended. c'mon, everyone else, let's hear it!

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:23:16 PST 1997
Hey, Myk asked us to I did.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:22:15 PST 1997
I've been talking to the wall/and it's been answering me/oh, darling, how I miss you/I'm just the mere shadow of my former selfishness/I crave the silhouette of your kiss/

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:21:35 PST 1997
Oh. There is plenty wrong with Prince. For this singular purpose however I had to admit he seemed appropriate. Thanks for sharing rOb.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:20:09 PST 1997
Hi Decoy. Put your earplugs in and smile pleasantly. CW - what are you talking about?

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:19:16 PST 1997
I kinda like Prince (or whatever the hell his name is)...he was on Letterman the other night. Not bad. Better than when Elvis Costello was on recently, dressed like a rap star. UGH!

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:17:25 PST 1997
Gett off!

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:17:02 PST 1997
There's absolutely nothing wrong with Prince......

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:17:00 PST 1997
Well, as I've already said, Claire and I used to make love to 'Low', by Bowie. The second side, with all the instrumentals? Absoulutely excellent. Also, my ex-ex-girlfriend and I once used a Morrisey album. Not sure which one, though. The first Bjork album is a sultry one, as well. Yes. Claire and I used that one, too.

FROM: Decoy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:16:49 PST 1997
Let someone elses crush zone absorb the impact. I'l always remember the sight of the back of my Explorer all wrinkled up with a baby carriage compacted in amongst the twisted metal and broken glass. Cars are like motorcycles to me now, great fun - but not for use in traffic. Only thing now is I wish I had gotten a Suburban instead. Hi sleepy, myk, cw, rOb, cushca. Damn, I have to go - just got a sick baby call, I'm off to daycareland. Bye; looks like I may be home the rest of the day.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:16:17 PST 1997
the anonymous one is a South Park fan. cool.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:15:07 PST 1997
You bastards! And I'm not naive, I just play it on the message board.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:14:42 PST 1997
Oops. 7:11:47 was me.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:14:38 PST 1997
Oh, dear...don't tell me South Park has invaded this board as well....

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:14:30 PST 1997
or, more to the point, a good album for "lovin'". anyone have any favorite albums for that sort of thing? please.. nothing predictable like "Barry's White's Ballad Collection" or sappy like "Barry Manilow's Golden Oldies". pesonally, i dig Love & Rockets "Express". i just do. though i haven't tried it, i bet their latest, "sweet FA" would be as good or better. don't be shy, let's hear your faves...

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:14:11 PST 1997
And just so we are absolutely clear on this, I do not and will never own a Prince album.

DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:13:31 PST 1997
And now, the one and only John Stamos....'s brother...Richard.

DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:13:15 PST 1997
THERE. Whatever. What was the name of that album now? I've blocked it out good.

DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:12:08 PST 1997
Lov-ing you is easy 'cause you're do do do..ahhhhhhhhh!

DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:11:47 PST 1997
Stuff - that thing people sometimes do, every now and then, occasionally.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:11:45 PST 1997
Sleepy - I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. That was this one Prince album though....

DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:11:21 PST 1997

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:11:03 PST 1997

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:10:45 PST 1997

DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:10:12 PST 1997
No, I don't. What's lurve?

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:09:59 PST 1997
Which? The free kitten? He's, oh what is it now... nine weeks old.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:09:08 PST 1997
Grant Phillips said once that 'Fuzzy' was often cited as a good album for 'lurve', if you know what I mean.

FROM: Corky from Denver
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:07:59 PST 1997
How old is the cat?

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:07:18 PST 1997
This is the hook in the crook of your neck....

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:07:02 PST 1997
In sharp relief to Cushca's twisted bitterness.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:06:04 PST 1997
Uh...Sleepy, I guess. I never thought about it...For international orders if you could just add $2.00 to cover the extra postage that'd be great.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:05:55 PST 1997
CW - Fuzzy is a damn fine album. I recommend that you acquire it.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:04:57 PST 1997
Myk - it's a line from 1974. I'm the happiest girl alive (ironic grin).

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:04:14 PST 1997
Hey rOb. The orders are streaming in. Just so I've got it strait, Fuzzy is the name of a very good album by the band Grant Lee Buffalo? I've got two coffees and that's just perfect for me.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:02:27 PST 1997
whoah, sleepy hits me with momentary melancholy. cut it out! cushca plays hard to get so well... especially when she's an ocean away... hey wax, i need more milk... meow!

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 07:00:31 PST 1997
That's the wrong way round, isn't it?

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:58:44 PST 1997
August was grey... it just faded away.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:58:01 PST 1997
rOb - do you accept international orders for your CD? Can I send you a travellers cheque?

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:54:57 PST 1997
oh, say it isn't so, cushca! oh yes... you will be mine. *grin*

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:52:56 PST 1997
Sleepy.....'Fuzzy' is one of my favourite albums as well.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:50:52 PST 1997
Oooh Myk - Cushca slammed you good. ...festering in the back yard.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:48:10 PST 1997
yeah, wax, it's truly crazy... women who can barely see out the windows are driving vehicles like Tahoes! this must end. these behemoths make my Cherokee look small.

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:47:35 PST 1997
....well that's about as likely as me turning down the offer of a jam doughnut.......

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:43:42 PST 1997
cushca: one day i'd like to see your english pants. giggle.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:43:38 PST 1997
But what else could you smell back then? You didn't have to inhale too hard.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:42:00 PST 1997
heh heh... oh, the dangers of homonyms. this "pants" things is outta hand.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:41:14 PST 1997
I don't get annoyed. I like it. Yeh Myk. Decoy drove a Ford Explorer until a bigger pick up truck slamed into the back of it. Now he has a freaking Tahoe. My little car is no match for the likes of that. But at least their insurance rates are rising. Pay more because you are a danger to others. Seems fair to me. Pants? Who said anything about pants? It's the stench of rotting minds.

FROM: <Cushca>
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:41:01 PST 1997
Well I meant English ones.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:40:12 PST 1997
I saw a gorgeous pale yellow MGB in Portland, Maine. Just before I went to a cat show. That was a strange day...

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:38:18 PST 1997
Cushca - I meant American 'pants'.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:37:11 PST 1997
yeah, the MGBs rule, and they can even be found, occasionally, on US streets. a little more scary to drive them here, since we now have everyone driving large sport utility vehicles.

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:37:07 PST 1997
No it's the Bendy Bully!!!!!!! It's happening again! Sleepy, you know full well how annoyed people get when we sink to this level....

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:35:24 PST 1997
You like Jim Bowen's pants??

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:34:34 PST 1997
Stop talking pants.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:34:06 PST 1997
Cushca - you fancy Jim Bowen??

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:31:53 PST 1997
I'm being a silly girly. But even when I'm being silly, I know that a British racing green MGB GT would be much better than a Mini. Just so everybody knows how my twisted mind works, the Mini Metro statement was a reference to a quiz show called Bullseye which was very popular here in the mid-80's. It was hosted by Jim Bowen and was devised around the game of darts. And you could win a Bendy Bully. Or a Mini Metro. And all the contestants were fat Northerners who couldn't play darts to save their Granny.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:25:48 PST 1997
are you in a contest to win a Mini, Cushca, or are you just being silly?

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:22:45 PST 1997
ooh, i like minis. if i ever move to the UK, i'm going to buy a mini. a british racing green mini! yeah! hell, i'll buy 2! they would only take one parking space, i suppose.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:21:45 PST 1997
Even I don't know what she's going on about now.

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:19:05 PST 1997
As with most things. God I'm bitter! And twisted too! Do I win the Mini Metro?

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:17:56 PST 1997
Cushca: you wouldn't want the kitty cat, because it would have to spend a long time in quarantine before being allowed to enter the UK. By that time, a normally placid cat would be one grumpy puss.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:12:39 PST 1997
Tends to be litterbox trained, but there are no guaranties.

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:06:45 PST 1997
Is it toilet trained???

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 06:00:19 PST 1997
FREE KITTEN TO A GOOD HOME (Needs shots, worming and a flea bath)

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:58:56 PST 1997
wax is always doing that to me, metaphorically speaking. prrr...

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:54:58 PST 1997
CW - pick Myk up by the scruff of his neck and put him back in the basket.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:53:07 PST 1997
by the way, mr wax, i feel a little closer to you, now that i've been informed that i was once in your feline womb. such a bond we have. meow. giggle. purr...

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:51:32 PST 1997
she is gorgeous, indeed. and how did YOU spend your evening, cushca? details or vagaries... whatever best fits the tale.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:51:16 PST 1997
'Jackanory' was a childrens' television programme many moons ago. The presenter would read out a 15 minute excerpt from a book every day.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:48:43 PST 1997
Jackanory tell a story?

FROM: Cushca
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:47:55 PST 1997
Never fear, the gorgeous Cushca is here....

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:47:08 PST 1997
Thank you for your story Mrs Resinbags. Jackanory, tell a story.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:45:19 PST 1997
i'm glad you had a fine time at the Silver Sun show. that bit about Babe prompting a desire for bacon... you should be ashamed! of course, when i finish a ham sandwich, i like to say the famed words said to Babe in the film: "That'll do, Pig". yum. heh heh. and where is my cushca today?

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:40:26 PST 1997
Good morning Myk. I need more coffee.

FROM: Mrs. Resinsbag's Friday Snippet
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:38:49 PST 1997
"Rest a--ured, we'll have none of that nonsense here at Gunther Williams School for Boys", Mr. Wilkens said soothingly to Mrs. Ray. She held her eight year old son Dexter firmly by the tip of his left ear, a grip he had long since learned not to try and squirm out of. It's just that this is the fifth school we've tried, and they've all said the same things at first. Then the fires start, and the water supply gets tainted and... well...." Mrs. Ray said, giving the ear a slight loving tug. "Oh no, Mr. Wilkens replied, " our track record is quite exemplary. Even the most, shall we say, stubborn cases have found a happy home here at Williams". "Well, all right then," Mrs. Ray said. The ear was traded off and Mr. Wilkens found himself the joyful recipient of a sharp kick on the left shin. He winced slightly but bore the pain well. "Good bye then, Mrs. Ray". See you on Parents visiting weekend in a couple months. Mrs. Ray left and Mrs. Wilkens led Dexter down a dark hallway with doors all along both sides. "Come then Dexter" Mr. Wilkens said. "Let's meet your teachers shall we?" and with that, a slow, wicked laugh began to build deep inside his chest." "Get stuffed!" Little Dexter advised, but tears were running down Mr. Wilkens cheeks now he was laughing so hard. He convulsed and lost his grip on Dexter's ear. Instantly Dexter was off down the hall at a flat run. Mr. Wilkens was writhing about on the floor still laughing uncontrollably. When Dexter got to the door marked "EXIT" he found it was painted onto the wall. He turned to see the long hall way, all the doors opening and heads sticking out. Ghastly ghoulish hideous inhuman heads. Eyes everywhere, bulbous protrusions in the most uncomfortable places, mouths full of filthy unbrushed razor sharp teeth protruding haphazardly in all directions. As the heads emerged Dexter saw they were attached to large muscular bodies with veined leathery wings branching from behind their shoulder blades. Several of them held crude battle axes which seemed to be crusted with old blood. One had a chunk of something hanging by a stringy bit. The largest, most hideous monster of them all stepped slowly forward toward Dexter and held out a lesson book. Way down the hall, slightly recovered, Mr. Wilkens shouted, "Mr. Ray, meet the faculty!"

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:38:45 PST 1997
Morning, Myk.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:38:11 PST 1997
Praise be to piggy. I'm a really good vegetarian, aren't I?! I remember hearing a radio review of 'Babe' once and consequently hankering after a bacon sandwich. I later caught the oven on fire cooking it - divine retribution, I think! I had to open all the windows in the flat and it was snowing outside. What a nightmare!

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:36:09 PST 1997
good morning, folks! quite a confession, willybee. a bit TOO much honesty regarding early sexual experiences, but i'd have to admit that it kept me reading. i'm so easy like that.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:34:51 PST 1997
That's sounds good. I'd have one for breakfast. I thought you only ate chicken and bacon?

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:18:35 PST 1997
Well, The Montrose Avenue were supposed to be playing, but one of them has flu, so they're not any more. I'm still on a SS high, so I'm not too disappointed. Toasted cheese and ham sandwich. Yum.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 05:01:36 PST 1997
That's so cute. So Silver Sun was good. I'm glad. What's tonight?

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 04:54:36 PST 1997
Hi CW. Yes, you are the mother cat and we are all your little kittens.

FROM: Chewing Wax
DATE: Fri Dec 5 04:52:46 PST 1997
Good morning. That was a good nights postings. Chewing Wax and his litter? I have no idea what wb's talking about. Now I have to get coffee. And Thanks to WLA for that news flash.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 04:33:26 PST 1997
Back for a few minutes. Good news about Grant Lee Philips and our man in Oxford (today, anyway), WLA. I like Grant Lee Buffalo very much (and Buffalo Tom - what is it about buffaloes?!). 'Fuzzy' is one of my all time favourite albums. I also own a Shiva Burlesque album, which I intend to crack open this weekend. Doesn't Chris Isaak come from Stockton? I have a head full of trivia. Honey don't think...

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:37:51 PST 1997

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:37:01 PST 1997
Ah, yes. It's always secretly thrilling to get signed goodies. Anyway, I've got to do some serious work now. I wish you strength to get through the day. Take care, wb.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:31:37 PST 1997
I picked up a couple of singles and posters, maybe. 'bouta $150.00 worth. Everything got extremely expensive, but what a thrill. And it's all signed.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:27:51 PST 1997
My friend knew them many, many years back. Sweden, eh? Nice country. What did you want in the auction?

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:23:42 PST 1997
I do too, but they no longer live in Aus. Marty lives in London, Steve in Sweden. Marty supposed to contact me about some stuff I bid in his auction.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:21:01 PST 1997
An Australian friend of mine knew Steve Kilbey. I think the Australian music scene is a close-knit community.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:18:59 PST 1997
No, they just take forever to come out with new albums. Steve Kilbey is in my opinion at least, the most talented musician on earth! Everything he touches turns to gold (almost everything earthed was a bore).

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:17:30 PST 1997
I always feel too guilty to skive off from work.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:16:00 PST 1997
Aw, never mind. Steve Kilbey. There's a name from the past. A friend of mine was a big Church fan. Didn't they use to keep splitting up and reforming?

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:15:11 PST 1997
Couldn't screw him over, he was a friend before a boss, guilt trip.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:14:06 PST 1997
No I started a new job 'bout a month ago. Intenet Explorer. Steve Kilbey and Marty Wilson-Piper are doing a acoustic tour of Ireland in Jan. AND I CAN'T GO!!!!WAAAAAHHHHH!

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:12:11 PST 1997
Not that I would ever suggest screwing a company over, or anything...

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:11:28 PST 1997

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:11:03 PST 1997
Can you feign a non-specific sickness and stay at home, or do you not get sick pay?

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:10:21 PST 1997
I keep losing the Expl.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:08:59 PST 1997
It's a fitting term at the moment.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:05:32 PST 1997
It means completely tired and wasted.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:04:32 PST 1997
knackered??? I'm clueless on this one.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:02:06 PST 1997
That's me, knackered - although it probably applies to you as well.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:01:07 PST 1997
.. and knackered, obviously...

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:00:33 PST 1997
Thank you, Four Noble truths-words to live by! Have coffee, but not nearly enough.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 03:00:22 PST 1997
I won't bore you with the details, but Mark Eiztel and Silver Sun were glorious and technicoloured. I'm feeling exhilarated this morning.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 02:58:27 PST 1997
Went off the deep end last night, how is life in your corner of our spherical home? Did you enjoy the concert, Silver Streak, Silver Sun, Silver Fish?

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 02:58:09 PST 1997
'got' coffee. Sigh.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 02:57:31 PST 1997
I enjoyed your big posting yesterday. I'm dipping into a book on Buddhism at the moment. I hope you've coffee.

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 02:54:44 PST 1997
Awful night, just awful. Gotta stop doing this! Would sleep but I need money.

FROM: Sleepy
DATE: Fri Dec 5 02:53:29 PST 1997
Hello? Is that you wb? Are you suffering?

DATE: Fri Dec 5 02:47:58 PST 1997
uuugggh!!!!!!Sleepy, you there?

DATE: Fri Dec 5 00:36:35 PST 1997
Good luck hooded

FROM: wb
DATE: Fri Dec 5 00:32:30 PST 1997
God lick hoode with the Cleveland airport. It's got the highest number of "mishaps" in the country.

FROM: willybee <True Confessions (as seen on t.v.)>
DATE: Fri Dec 5 00:28:50 PST 1997
Well now you've all gone and flustered me. I felt genuinely hurt by hooded's comments of being a wacko! For this reason I am now for the first and last time, going to admit my wrongdoings on this silly board. I must take credit or blame (depending on which one you read) for most of those wonderful stories, musings, laments, etc. I am an anon., but you already knew that didn't you? There are some wonderful support groups for people like myself in my area, A.A. (Anon. Anonymous). I am in the process of getting a sponsor and beating this sickness, with a stick if I have to! The last week I tried to be a good, productive member of the board. I even mentioned RH on several occasions. I just cannot for some reason be accepted by CW and his litter. I do not cut and paste, I do not post during the day, 'cept at the first part of my lunch. I do chant as Myk would say. I have way to many runins with people of authority. My first sexual experience (with someone other than myself) was when I was 14. I remember the sweating, feeling my blood boil, the nervousness, then came time to do it. We were at a friend's of mine girlfriend. It didn't take very long at all, and what few seconds it did take I don't remember (I think I blacked out)! I am not going to belittle anyone now, I probably won't make into work tomarrow. I first saw my mother naked when I was 5, and I've been jealous of women ever since. Sorry I felt the need for a joke. Myk's right, this board is funnier when you're drunk! I think r0b is right on the eye comment, there is a common thread throughout the album.((time for a song---They packed us up in boxes, wooden boxes and sent us home/undrneath the willow by the river near my headstone/(and all you do is carry on-and all you do is carry on)/ it's snowing now, its winter, rivers frozen,and still you come/ if I could only see you or touch you my pretty one/(repeat chorus)... oh well, I can't believe no is familiar Jack Frost's debut album. I am a follower af the teachings of Buddha. Has any one read The Lost Decade, The book about the Pogues?, it's a worthy read! Does anyone here have a clue what's it like to go through life ALWAYS being the ood man out??? Don't know what else to say. hmmmmm...... oh well

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 23:37:48 PST 1997
at the tone the time will be 2:37..... beep!

FROM: The One and Only Great and True Anonymous (d--k)
DATE: Thu Dec 4 22:33:48 PST 1997
Mighty Joe Moon's one of my fave's...descended from Stockton's Shiva Burlesque, a close family friend.

DATE: Thu Dec 4 22:02:14 PST 1997
L.A. Times/'Pop Music': "While in L.A. recently to do business related to his Jonathan Demme-directed performance film "Storefront Hitchc--k," Robyn Hitchc--k teamed with producer Jon Brion (who did Fiona Apple's debut) to record six songs for a new album. The two will finish the project when their schedules align in the new year. Grant Lee Buffalo's Grant Lee Phillips provided some guest vocals, and Hitchc--k returned the favor by guesting on sessions for that band's upcoming album." -- sorry, Myk, you're wrong, we ARE the CNN of Robyn news! . . . hee.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Thu Dec 4 21:36:08 PST 1997
I'm supposed to be up very early tommorow, so I'll see you day posters then.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Thu Dec 4 21:35:22 PST 1997
Yeah, hooded. I figured out the schism. I also got your e-mail. Hang in there, man, it only gets better. As for you, Curious George, you ask why I read the crap I profess to hate? Simple, I love showing my intellectual superiority over the mindless peons such as yourself.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Thu Dec 4 21:18:36 PST 1997
nope, hooded, i'm listed nowhere. we'll trade email at a chat sometime. come to think of it, we haven't all chatted for quite some time. hmmm... as for your job, i bet it's nice to perch up high on the cherry-picker on a nice summery spring day. these days, on the other hand...

FROM: hooedd, I mean hooded
DATE: Thu Dec 4 20:39:53 PST 1997
I work on the very lines we're communicating on, only outdoors. Its nasty, during winter, especially those 2 weeks (or months depending on the el nieno') when we get thet artic cold blast where its a -20 to -40 windchill. Every job has its bummers, mine's weather. I also get to work outside in the spring, summer and fall when all you office workers wish you had the day off! So we all trade something for something else. Myk- looked for you on 'globe of fegs' no Murphy in Washington. Well, we'll all exchange over some chat or something when we know who's there. 'I often dream of trains' is on tonight. No chat this weekend for me- off to the wacko's favorite place. Cleveland. Well Canton, but I fly to Cle. Football Hall of Fame, WooHoo! I'll rub Walter Paytons brass shoes for you all.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Thu Dec 4 19:51:45 PST 1997
damn, hooded, it's chilly in your world. now i know why you wear a hood. what kind of outdoor work do you do, hood? (be vague, the stalkers are lurking....)

FROM: hooed Shav,ed
DATE: Thu Dec 4 18:13:40 PST 1997
Buffalo even laughs as you?as I what?

FROM: Curious George
DATE: Thu Dec 4 17:33:01 PST 1997
So r0b, if you don't like reading this (crap). Why do you?

FROM: hooded
DATE: Thu Dec 4 17:00:41 PST 1997
It snowed today, just flurries. Dam.n cold though, uper 20's maybe. windchill of I think 10. Oh, to work inside with a computer. Nah, I'm the perfect sick puppy that loves to work in the shi.t. rOb have you figured out the shcism I mentioned last week? I posted you about it a few days ago, but with all the sputem thrown up on the board you probably didn't see it. I've got some writing to do tonight I check the board later. see ya'll, in tribute to my brother south of the mason/dixon line.

FROM: Jeezuz Shaves
DATE: Thu Dec 4 16:41:25 PST 1997
wb: please, for god's sake, learn to put the damn comma away from the word that follows. It is so obviously, idiotically you. You are so much a Cleveland Triple Dribble. Buffalo even laughs as you.

FROM: Anonymous 23
DATE: Thu Dec 4 16:39:26 PST 1997
Myk, you wish you were anonymous. But you're swell, just the way you are. Two, three, one, anonymous anonymous. Oh well. I dead.

FROM: Sir Charles Dingleberry
DATE: Thu Dec 4 16:17:48 PST 1997
Cleveland Butt Wads,my disturbed little friend.

FROM: Myk Murphy
DATE: Thu Dec 4 15:55:09 PST 1997
i hear ya, rob. i try to post in the evenings, when i can, and i'm horrified. there are only 2 anons, and they don't like each other.

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Thu Dec 4 15:39:49 PST 1997
Jeez, I feel so envious of Myk, and CW, and all the others who don't normally post at night. They are spared the horror of reading this crap.

FROM: 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 <2>
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:36:20 PST 1997
23 posts, not including this one, on this board...

FROM: Verna
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:34:31 PST 1997
By the way, a bad symptom? As opposed to what, a GOOD one?

FROM: City Slogans: 23rd in a series
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:33:47 PST 1997
Buffalo, where Cleveland Steals all of its Butt Wads

FROM: Cosmo
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:32:52 PST 1997
Remember that Seinfeld where Jerry says, "Who are these Butt Wads?!?"

FROM: The Great Dingle-Berry
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:31:54 PST 1997
Science has proven the existence of Butt Wads, but people in Cleveland are more likely to join the Flat Landers Club than the Butt Wad Appreciation Club. It is a little-known fact that Cleveland and Buffalo are two of the earliest Butt Wad Cult sites from the late-1700's. Sir Charles Dingleberry, my great great great great grandfather, was a mayor of Clevelandton and Grand Poobah of the Butt Wad Brotherhood.

FROM: This blows
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:22:05 PST 1997
Simple-Ton: The humor of the City Slogan listing was that they were ALL 23. Way to blow the joke, like you blow all of them.

FROM: Butt Wad Bob
DATE: Thu Dec 4 14:20:54 PST 1997
You two without me is a sad sight indeedee.

DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:56:16 PST 1997
You're referring to yourself in the third person again. A bad symptom my disturbed little friend.

FROM: willybee
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:53:03 PST 1997
I am out of here, willybee does have a life to live.....sometimes

DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:52:03 PST 1997
No. No. I'm not nor was I ever. I am Beautiful.

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:50:51 PST 1997
!!!!!!!!!YOU ARE VOLTAIC!!!!!

DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:48:17 PST 1997
You'll p--s Voltaic off. I used to have endless fun accusing him of being you. Like torturing a caged animal.

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:41:16 PST 1997
You are the first and 3rd.

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:40:26 PST 1997
What's a butt wad?

FROM: Always Here
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:40:19 PST 1997
Actually, wb, you are the 3rd anon. I was here well before you arrived.

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:39:55 PST 1997
Not I!

DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:38:15 PST 1997
Who's being naive now butt wad?

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:37:30 PST 1997
There is no 3rd anon.

FROM: ficken du
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:36:45 PST 1997
That whole scenario was fictitious, and anyhow I apologized.

FROM: Beautiful
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:35:29 PST 1997

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:33:31 PST 1997

FROM: City Slogans: 24th in a series
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:33:20 PST 1997
Cleveland, Home of the Child Molestation Accusation Squad

FROM: Samuel Taylor Clorets
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:18:40 PST 1997

FROM: Say it ain't so, Joe Blow!
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:17:44 PST 1997
Ah, but you do give a f--k, don't you? I hope so!

FROM: Verna
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:17:07 PST 1997
Plead my what to whom? How can you read with your head so far up your furnace, Hoover?

FROM: City Slogans: 23rd in a series
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:16:13 PST 1997
Cleveland, Home of the Chromosome Lottery

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:15:55 PST 1997
Why plead your lies to CW, he's too naive to know the difference, and the rest of them just don't give a f--k!

FROM: Buffalo Double
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:13:31 PST 1997
wb: I love it when you're rough with me, you Cleveland Triple Play!

FROM: That guy on SNL that used to be on Kids who can't read scripts well enough to know if he's choosing the right film but that's okay cuz rOb will choose for me from now on!
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:12:42 PST 1997
Sorry, gotta go read some scripts from Stanley Kubrick and Quentin whatsisname. I am tending toward choosing the new film by Mel Brooks, though--a spoof on '50s sit-coms called, Hey Honey, Where's the Soap?

FROM: wb
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:11:09 PST 1997
...and the Cal. jerkoff starts again.

FROM: Sis Kill Bert E.
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:10:13 PST 1997
Then there was that Woody Allen movie, and the new Arnold dramatic role, and Alien 21: Ripley Goes to Disneyworld...

FROM: Buffalo Double
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:08:34 PST 1997
The film the boy should have chosen was called Werewolf in the Secretary Pool. It was a new John Landis flick being shot on video. On location in Cleveland. It's the moving story of an upstart werewolf trying to make ends meet in today's downsized corporate world. Things are going badly until he accidentally chews off his bosses hand during a full moon boogie. Once his boss is out of the way he's promoted to district sales manager and hires a few other werewolves who have very creative ideas regarding competitors who happen to be vacationing at a remote fun fun in this laugh riot, and that boy from Kids/SNL took the lame National Lampoons Clam-Bake Serenade instead. What a dummy.

FROM: Moon
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:03:34 PST 1997
But I guess that's why he's being discussed on a totally unrelated message board today, and I would venture to guess that, right now, he's not talking about you or me.

FROM: Wally World
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:02:33 PST 1997
If only he had your brains with his talent, then he'd have made a good decision.

FROM: Dean Wormer
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:01:56 PST 1997
I mean, not one of the National Lampoon movies was ever a hit, was it.

FROM: Yah, right.
DATE: Thu Dec 4 13:00:58 PST 1997
Yah, I am sure that guy had plenty of scripts of good films in that HUGE pile of scripts his big shot agent sent over. He just saw that one and chose it because he like the TYPE style. Is that it?

FROM: rOb.
DATE: Thu Dec 4 12:43:38 PST 1997
About those movie gigs, if I were an actor, I would read the damn script before deciding to do the flick, thereby lowering the chances of me being in a bad film, like 'National Lampoon's Senior Trip.'

FROM: Decoy
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:42:37 PST 1997
Not too racy? Just tasteful.

FROM: hime
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:19:18 PST 1997
what?! That little ...

FROM: Mrs Squidgy
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:15:37 PST 1997
Well, since none of you will let me get a word in edgewise, I will go water the frog. Umberto says hi!

FROM: Thank you Prince
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:14:31 PST 1997
Thanks for not accusing me, Chewing Wax, of posting the big poop regurg from earlier. The fact is, I have been unable to post squat since yesterday's City Slogan posting. That one really angered the Anonymous Cancroid, didn't it.

FROM: Skull-Eye
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:10:54 PST 1997
Whew! That was close. Mule-Deer? Mule-Deer! Where the hell is Mule-Deer? Chewing Wax, your brother knows Homer Simplson personally? What's he like in real life?

FROM: Skull-Eye
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:09:42 PST 1997
I certainly hope area 51 hasn't vanished for good. That would be an alien abduction, wouldn't it?

FROM: Let he with the most to lose stand up and wag his wax doll
DATE: Thu Dec 4 11:08:16 PST 1997
rOb, about those movie gigs, you pick and choose yours, right?